Pain and awe

Having pulled through life-threatening septicaemia, Fabian has had to endure a number of further complications in rapid succession. The worst of these has been his stoma which has caused no end of problems. Ironically, we agreed to have this inserted last year to provide a safer and more convenient method for his feeds and meds. Latterly though, the site became infected and opened up as a gaping wound, with stomach contents leaking out. The actual catheter ended up inside his stomach (a first for the doctors) and after an anxious few days we were relieved when it came out the other end fully intact! Apparently this incident is being written up in a medical journal. The ‘gunshot wound’, as Fabian calls it, needs a daily change of dressing but is stubbornly refusing to heal on account of his low white count. We can’t consider further treatment whilst this is the case so it’s a nasty case of chicken and egg.
Thankfully, he is now an outpatient although hospital trips for reviews and blood products are routine. The high disease level is causing Fabian more or less continuos pain. This manifests as an aching deep in his bones and by all accounts is worse than muscular pain which could otherwise be simply relieved by heat patches. Instead we are having to give morphine via slow or quick release methods. Witnessing your child in pain is frankly gut-wrenching. But the downside to morphine is the fatigue and nausea side effects which tend to knock him out for long periods. Still, our incredible son keeps picking himself up and showing the resilience of which we are so in awe. We’ve begun a regimen of supplements to help restore his metabolism and lack of a normal diet. It’s a shame the healthiest ones taste the worst but he has become resigned to taking them without too much coercion. The years of toxic treatment have debilitated his frail body and I can only wonder how we will ever rebuild him, but I will leave no stone unturned in researching the best natural products to help do this.
Despite the gloomy tone of this entry, I want to commend the tremendous answers to worldwide prayers that have lifted our spirits as we have seen Fabian exceed medical expectation. The bible tells us that faith the size of a mustard seed can move mountains, so God is not trying to make it difficult for us to believe! More anon.